He Hates the Moon
by Grasspaw
Summary: Remus was just sitting at the top of the Astonomy Tower, wondering why his life was so terrible. What had he done to deserve it? But then, Lily Evans came up to talk. Maybe life's not so bad after all...


**Okay, I just LOVE the Remus/Lily pairing, so I feel extremely unworthy to write this. But, I had to. You know how it is. The Plot Pickles(tm) just take over your mind and won't let go. So, here we goes. (I own a total of nothing).**

Remus was sitting up at the top of the Astonomy tower on Tuesday night. He was in his third year of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, and he knew he shouldn't be up here at one in the morning; it was against the rules. But he didn't care. He had just felt the unexplainable urge to climb up the stairs and sit there, staring up at the sky. An almost full moon floated up there, surrounded by stars that were scattered over the inky blackness of the night.

His head was pounding from the Firewhisky James and Sirius had made him drink, and he was having trouble thinking straight.

He glared at the moon, his downfall. Really, it didn't make sense. It was just a rock, floating in space, orbiting around their earth. He had learned that in a muggle school when he was nine. So why did it affect him like that? He glared at it some more.. At night, it appeared silver. All the more reason to hate it. It was the color of a "precious metal" that he couldn't touch.

So were the stars. He hated those too.

He glared at the moon even more, willing it to fall right out of the sky and crush Fenrir Greyback, because Remus also hated him. He was the reason that Remus hated the moon and stars. And just about everything else.

The prejudice he had to face, the unfair laws against his kind, his parents who said they loved him but were lying, the fact that he had live with the worst curse anyone could ever face. Indeed, it would be better to just throw himself off the tower to the ground below and end it all. Then he perked up. Of course, why hadn't he thought of it before? He would do just that. Jump off the tower. Die. He would maybe miss his friends, but it would be worth it. He wouldn't have to be a werewolf anymore. He wouldn't have to face the upcoming agony.

Before he knew what he was doing, he was standing up and walking to the edge of the tower, staring at the ground below. It was a long drop. He would surely die.

Just as he was about to hoist his leg over the side, he heard the trapdoor open. Without a second thought, he pulled his leg back and through the Invisiblity Cloak, which he had "borrowed" from James, over himself, and stood perfectly still. A head was emerging from the hole in the floor. A head with flaming red hair. And bright green eyes, clouded with worry. Lily Evans clambered out of it, dressed in only her nightgown with a robe pulled over it.

"Remus?" she called softly. He didn't answer. "Remus, I know you're here. I also know you took Potter's cloak, so don't use that as an excuse. And don't try sneaking off, I'm standing on the door."

Remus sighed, pulled the cloak off of himself. "Hullo, Lily."

He concern lessened a bit, and she seemed relieved. "Hi, Remus. What are you doing up here?"

"Just watching the sky." He walked over and sat back on the bench in his former position, staring broodingly up. She sat down next to him. "It's beautiful tonight," she said softly. Aparently, this was the wrong thing to say.

"Oh, yes," he said, his voice shockingly bitter. But there was something else. There an undescribable sense of longing in his voice, and a strange hunger in his eyes. "Absolutely beautiful. The moon's going to destroy me in two nights, but at least it's _beautiful._" His tone dripped scorn and sarcasm, yet there was still the longing, the burning intensity.

"W-what do you mean?" Lily had never heard kind, quiet Remus Lupin speak like that to anyone, much less _her._ He remebered too late that she did not know his secret. But he had the urge to tell her, and decided to go with his gut instinct, even it was most likely brought un by the Firewhiskey.

"The moon. It's going to try to kill me. It has every month for the past eight and a half years. It's going to make me rip and claw at myself. It's going to ake me end up in the Hospital Wing for several days. And it's not my fault. I didn't do anything to deserve it. It's going to make me into a monster."

She was staring at him with wide, scared eyes. He no longer seemed angry at her, but at somthing else. But now his figure slumped forward some, and he looked utterly defeated. She timidly placed a hand on his arm.

He shook it off. "Don't touch me."

"Why not?" she said, sounding sad.

"You have your silver bracelet on."

She looked down. Sure enough, there it was. Then, in a flash, she understood. His strange disappearences each month. His aversion to anything silver. How could she not have noticed it until now?

"Remus? Are you a..."

"Werewolf." He finished the thought for her, but continued with his own. "There, go ahead. Run, scream, tell everyone. I'll leave tomorrow."

She took her braclet off and, standing, tossed it off the side of tower. Then she sat back down and wrapped her arm around his shoulder. "I won't tell."

He looked down at her. She was so sweet, so innocent... Well, maybe he could last another full moon.


End file.
